On August 20, 2012 I wrote this article before. It was a rough time and I do stand by my words. The man name Elideth Bello did manage to try to get me back. But, I failed to see it and blocked him from my life. So he will never be a part of my life. As of Sept. 5, 2012 I kissed him goodbye. I still hold his CD of Lady GaGa’s Born This Way but I will sell it to someone who wants it. Here is the article. Enjoy getting to know me again.
The glorious days of men are never-ending for me. After all, I live in a dream. A dream where I will find the Prince Charming of my dreams and he will say the words “I love you” and really mean it. I am not afraid to say it in Spanish but in English, I am here alone saying it for my dreams are being destroyed. For you see, “I love you” is far too powerful. Men abused it too many times to me. And I can not say it that easily again. I remember the first time I ever said it. I remember the last time I read it. “I love you…” Bull shit.
The last one who said those three unfaithful words, to me, was a man name Elideth Bello. I do not know if that is his real name for he is an illegal immigrant. Yes, I realize I am ranting on the computer but, I do not think he will ever read this and understand what he has done. The power of the words “I love you” should be in person, not over the computer. For anyone can say it as simple as that. I can not for I have a hard time believing in it or saying it regardless where I am at. Anyways…
He said it around July 2012. Think of this: Okay, so we met around that time last year and I was very uncertain if I was ready to date or not. We went on four different dates, food and sex was only allowed. After all, I was busy doing summer classes and also, I will admit, there was an another man in my life. Of course, they both knew that I was seeing the other so I am not a whore. Never will be one. Elideth said goodbye last year after he realized I was not “ready” to date. Who is? No one. You take a chance, dear men, on me.
Anyways, he came back this year and let me tell you, I was surprised. After all, he walked away and well, now I am “sick.” I told him and he was going to stick by. And then he said the ungrateful words “I love you” in English. Mind you, he only speaks Spanish so for me, it was heart stopping. He told me to think about it and still wants to date me. But then, tragedy struck us both. He started with the comments of a mother-in-law.
I am like “Hold up!
What the fuck?
You called my mother, your mother-in-law!
And now you are parading around,
saying your mother-in-law is cooking for you!
Bull shit! We are done!”
If he really did love me, he would have messaged me, explaining the things. But nope. And if he really did LOVE me, he would have added me again. But it has been a whole week or so, and yet, NADA! I am much better that he is no longer in my life. I hope he finds someone he can actually say I LOVE YOU instead of being fake about it.
So the words “I love you” is very hard for me to believe. English: Simple and used in a friendly atmosphere…Spanish: complexity and very hard to say..even though it can be two words….
It is like “Toxic” by Britney Spears. As Britney sang “With the taste of your lips/I am on a ride/You’re toxic/I’m slipping under.”
Okay, hold up. How does that tie in? She is talking about love. Well, I used to care and have some love for him. But no…I slipped under because he pushed away. Now he wants me back and it will not happen. So, the ride…I am getting off, after his words of “I love you” does not exist for me anymore. Nor for anyone…good luck saying it.
You
Will
Need
It!
Interesting Read and he was a person of little class and little honesty, he was out for something u had and got it and used u as a excuse to break up. You should never use the actions of one sad pathetic individual as a guideline to messure all other men by there is alot of good ones out there that want a chance and may not fully reach the high limit u set no matter how hard they jump. Also the words I Love You is one thing but i would have been more concerned with the wording “Im in love with you” then i would have taken it more serious.
Thank you Jeremy. I do agree with you that he was out for something that I had and wanted it. But never the less, I am not measuring by his own faults to measure men in general. I had met some real decent men in my life, and well, they will be mentioned as I progressed through this blog. Yes, if the words were “I am in love with you” will make more sense and have more power and beauty behind it. Instead the insensitive words of “I love you.” “I love you” had made me taken aback because of my history, and well, where he has said these indescribable words. It is very insensitive to say it online, I believe. It should be said in person and when you see the one who takes your heart in love instead of not seeing each other in over a year because of your poor “dumping skills” and you say it. That’s why I am not sure how to feel when “I love you” is said and “I love you” is far too common in my vocabulary when I speak to my lady friends. I will appreciate what he has taught me, but never again, will I do the same mistake he has done to me or what I had done in my past. Thought to give you some of my 2 cents.
Hope to see you read & comment more as I post how my life begins to shape as a writer. 
if ur on YIM i am too also I will try to remember not to say I love u to you anymore even though as a Wiccan Gaurdian I do love all as Fellow Humans with hearts and desires, it is not meant as “Im in love with you” ( which by the way i have yet to say to another) but in my faith it is my path to help and care about others and that’s not possible if one i don’t love myself first and two cant love others.
So if by chance i do forget and say it i don’t mean to be like that ass and make u think im insincere cause i do mean it. I love all its part of my path in life I have a big heart but have yet to find one i can say “im in love with you” and have share my existence.
You can say “I love you” to me, for it is common to say it. But for me to really feel it, English must not be spoken. That is why I can not say it naturally without my heart beating for love. I, too, have a very big heart as I care for a lot of my friends and family right before myself. Despite all the PAIN in my life, I still manage to still love. I always will because LOVE is on so many different ways. To share one’s existence is a beautiful thing as I hope someday soon I will find the one that will share with me everything I need in a man. I felt it with very few people and I will continue to love myself despite all my flaws. I want a man to love my flaws but perfection is seen by most which is cruel. I never will be perfect to anyone, not even my job as an actor. But that’s okay. I do not need it.
Paul I dont know of any other ways to say I love u but in english and u should never stop loving urself no matter what or who it is. as far as flaws to defend myself I must tell u i dont look at a mans apperances or looks first or flaws for that matter i look at their Personality and also their Heart.
If u would like to chat im online now
I understand how you feel. Those three little words are used too freely and not enough meaning. I know how to say it in several languages and yet I won’t use them unless I really mean it. I’m a very old fashioned romantic deep on the inside with a big heart but that heart is guarded by a fortress with a crazy dragon. I even use it sparingly with my closest friends and family.
This is a reaction from people who have been hurt in the past and not quite healed yet. The guy you are talking about may have his own reasons for his actions even as it may appear that he just wanted something from you. It’s disturbing that he would just up and disappear like that and weakens the grasp that his statement of love could have had. It’s his loss. Walk forward into the future stronger with each experience and maybe you’ll find someone worth your while.
To seek happiness, one must risk suffering
That is really cool, mate. Those words should be fashioned when you feel you are in a true love. I guess in some way he got what he wanted. But in the long way, he did not got me in the bedroom and I do still have his CD. Haha…I am a real romantic and he was for quite some time until the end. There is a lot more to the story after this. But this is just one story of why I do not believe “I love you.” Let’s see what happens. I will be stronger than he will ever be…after all, I have more experiences to share.
Keep reading and commenting. I love this!